Ohio Astrology Offers Santorum $25 to Mow Lawn

Posted on March 30, 2012 by ohioastrology

Every day the list of Mitt Romney endorsers grows. Today Wisconsin Rep Ryan Paul endorsed Romney for GOP Presidential Candidate following in the footsteps Republican Party titans Jeb Bush, George H. W. Bush, Marco Rubio and Governor Chris Christie.

The message is clear – runner-up Rick Santorum needs to cease and desist.

While a message from the Bushes is like a message from Zeus, Ohio Astrology knows that Santorum is made of rock and very well may resist the call to end his campaign. Rock responds to the call of water and wind, but over very long periods of time.

Ohio Astrology, having unique insight into the candidates, would like to offer advice. As usual, OHA helps where it can.

Rick Santorum

This may very well be the last time Santorum’s name is emboldened upon this blog. Santorum has sun in fixed earth sign Taurus and moon in fixed air sign Aquarius.

For starters, fixed signs can’t be pushed. Pushing against fixed signs is like trying to push a fire hydrant. I once bumped into a fire hydrant on a walk and still have the bruise.

A fire hydrant is built very, very sturdy to withstand the pressure within. Open the hydrant and water will knock you over.

Notice that Santorum has been nasty lately? Someone’s pushing the hydrant.

Aquarius moon

Let’s start with the moon in Aquarius. Aquarius has a very fixed view of how things “should be,” an idealistic impression that it wants to force upon the world. Often these ideas are progressive and it can take years for society to catch up.

Aquarius is also a rebel. Say “left” and Aquarius will go right. Say “get out of the race” and Aquarius will stay in.

Don’t send a command to an Aquarius moon (or sun).

Taurus sun

Taurus is a practical earth sign that views the world in concrete terms. There’s the right way to do things and the wrong way. You balance your checkbook and everyone is happy. If there’s a problem, fix it. If there’s not a problem, leave it alone.

Taurus can be quite peaceful in its simplicity because it really doesn’t force itself onto the world. It’s happy doing things the “right” way and assumes everyone will notice the peace that comes with adapting to the material world and follow suit.

Taurus, like all earth signs, likes to be useful and productive. Taurus is a creature of the physical world and likes to accumulate. More than any other sign, Taurus derives pleasure from material goods.

What to do with Rick?

The GOP must remember that Santorum is currently unemployed. Taurus likes to be employed and productive. You might argue that all signs like this; I disagree. Everyone wants money, but not all want to work.

With Jupiter transiting his sun, Santorum is looking to increase his income.

The GOP, to get rid of Santorum, needs to offer him a job, and quickly. A job that is both money-earning (Taurus) and unusual (Aquarius) would suit Santorum best. OHA has already suggested Ambassador to the Philippines, but this won’t happen, if it happens at all, until January 2013.

While the GOP finds the perfect election season position for Santorum, OHA extends the offer to have Santorum mow my lawn for $25. It’s been a warm and rainy March and the lawn needs a trim.

Santorum, supporter of family values, manufacturing and good old-fashioned hard work and opponent of unemployment benefits will probably jump at this opportunity. It’s also a chance to lose that Jupiter-transit-Taurus-sun campaign weight.

That’s $25 for good, hard work – $25 of pride. No welfare, no unemployment benefits.

My Google search indicated that there are 55 million registered Republicans. To be conservative, let’s say that’s 25 million households and half of those have a lawn. That makes 12.5 million Republican households that could hire Santorum to mow the lawn.

If Republicans rally to the cause and offer Santorum $25 to mow the lawn, Santorum could earn $312.5 million by the end of the summer. Assuming a 33% tax rate, Santorum can pocket $209.4 million. In income, Santorum will have beaten Romney.

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Who Cares More About Your Health, Obama or Romney?

Posted on March 29, 2012 by ohioastrology

As President Obama’s health care plan, lovingly called “Obamacare” which, if Rick Santorum is to be believed, is modeled after Mitt Romney’s Massachusetts plan, lovingly called “Romneycare,” is being challenged at the Supreme Court I wondered:

“Who cares more about my health, Obama or Romney?”

Imaginative astrological role-playing game

In an imaginative astrological role-playing game, I see this scene:

I am at the bus stop waiting for a bus. Both Obama and Romney are there also waiting for a bus, Obama reading People magazine and Romney reading The Wall Street Journal.

I sneeze. Both men look at me.

Obama, sun in Leo and moon in Gemini, sees a chance to talk to a beautiful woman (me). He digs in his pockets and pulls out a tissue, hands it to me and says that while my nose is red with cold, it’s still the most beautiful nose he’s ever seen.

Romney, sun in Pisces and moon in Scorpio, is hesitant at first to talk to me because he’s shy. However, he worries about the snot dripping from my nose because soon it will land on my fine new jacket. He digs in his briefcase and finds his silk handkerchief and gives it to me.

“I don’t need it back,” he says.

Romney then goes back to the briefcase for hand sanitizer.

Which man cares more?

Leo is one of the most self-centered signs of the zodiac. Regardless, it’s loving and fun to be around so much of this self-centeredness is forgiven. Leo hands me a tissue because it’s the romantic and chivalrous thing to do. Moon in Gemini hands me the tissue because it’s something to do while experiencing the boredom of the bus stop. Handing me a tissue is opportunity to talk.

Pisces is the most altruistic of the signs. Pisces is probably the only sign that will sacrifice and because of that trait is prone to victimhood. Romney would give me that silk handkerchief even if it was a gift from his late great-great grandmother.

The Scorpio moon would probably worry that my cold was the beginning of a serious illness and would suggest I go to the doctor.

While both men would “care” in the colloquial sense, water signs can feel the pain of others and Pisces can help without anyone ever knowing about it.

Leo, on the other hand, wants recognition for heroic acts. For a Leo, any act is heroic.

Romney cares more about my health, I think

I really don’t know if Obama or Romney cares more about my health. This is just a blog.

But I would guess if these men were regular old guys at the bus stop, Romney would care more.

Checking with the cat

Just to check my hunch, I asked my tuxedo cat, Lacy.

“Do you think it makes sense that a Pisces/Scorpio cares more about my health than a Leo/Gemini?”

“Yes, but which cares more about feline health?” she asked.

How typical. Whenever I talk to my cat about a government policy, she always selfishly asks, “What’s in it for me?”

“Feline health,” I answered, “is not included in either Obamacare or Romneycare. Health care reform is only for people.”

“Then I don’t care.”

Posted in 2012 Presidential Election | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

ABBAstrology

Posted on March 28, 2012 by ohioastrology

What happened to ABBA?

As a child in the 1970s, I was part of the original ABBA fever. By the time they quietly disbanded in the early 1980s, I had moved into punk music.

Punk was a phase, ABBA is forever.

I have to admit, though, I can’t listen to ABBA non-stop like I did when I was nine. But I still can’t resist those entertainment show specials about ABBA or movies that contain ABBA-mania such as Muriel’s Wedding or Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

ABBA the band name is an amalgamation of the first letters of the Swedish members’ names: Agnetha Faltskog, Bjorn Ulvaeus, Benny Andersson and Anni-Frid Lyngstad. I don’t know who’s “A” and who’s “B” comes first.

It’s also a pairing of married couples with Anni-Frid & Benny and Agnetha & Bjorn.

Let’s use astrology to piece together why four talented people on top of the world of pop charts quietly ended the fame.

The Men

Both men, Benny and Bjorn, have moon in Libra conjunct Neptune. More than anything, these two want to be married, be popular and be liked. The Neptune influence makes both men attractive and charming to others.

That doesn’t mean Libra doesn’t love its arguments, but Libra ultimately reacts to others, altering its self and identity to match what it perceives the “other” wants.

Benny is a little more aggressive (Sun conjunct Mars in Sagittarius) and controlling (Saturn conjunct Pluto in Leo) than Bjorn. Benny’s Mars/sun conjunction shows great athletic ability. Benny is probably in constant motion and wants those around him in constant motion as well.

Bjorn has sun in Taurus, Mars in Pisces and that moon/Neptune in Libra. Bjorn is one dreamer, who probably was the most happy spending his life writing music. When not writing music he may have liked to lead a life of both pleasure and indulgence. This is a man who would take a three-hour bath after a five-hour nap then gaze out the window for a while. Bjorn doesn’t rush.

Bjorn seems the least likely to cause strife. Both Taurus and Libra like pleasure too much to ruin it with silly desires, such as the need to be in the front of the picture on the album cover.

Benny might have wandered off eventually, as Sagittarians do. Sagittarius wouldn’t quit the band, per se, but simply move off into a new adventure and kind of forget the old adventure.

The Women

Agnetha is an Aries with Scorpio moon. Aries is aggressive and Scorpio is intense and vengeful. Combined, this is an extremely competitive individual. Lady Gaga has this combination and she’s known for her bad romances.

Saturn and Mars both in Virgo, Agnetha is also one intense perfectionist.

Agnetha’s sun (Aries) is opposite her ex-husband Bjorn’s moon (Libra) and Bjorn’s sun (Taurus) is in opposite sign to Agnetha’s moon (Scorpio).

Clearly Agnetha and Bjorn are opposites that attracted. Agnetha would have been the aggressor and Bjorn might have felt safe and comfortable for someone with such an intense nature.

Anni-Frid has sun in intense Scorpio and moon in sensitive Pisces. Both are water signs and it’s not surprising that Wikipedia says she’s the most reclusive of the group. Pisces moon is extremely sensitive so the glare of the lights may have been too much for this woman.

Anni-Frid’s ex-husband Benny’s Sagittarian sun is square that moon. He probably roused her from a life in her imagination and physically carried her out into the spotlight. He would have been the motivator in that relationship, always seeking new sites and stimulation. She’s the introvert, he the extrovert.

Anni-Frid’s intense Scorpio sun might have been frustrated by the fun-loving but somewhat irresponsible Sagittarian sun husband. Anni-Frid, with Scorpio and Pisces, cries for the world. Her ex-husband tries to cheer up the world.

What happened?

The women are much more intense than the men. I could imagine Agnetha having issues surrounding competition and Anni-Frid having issues regarding the intense pressure that super-stardom brings.

I could also imagine that the wives felt more kinship with the not-husband partner.

Agnetha and Benny share fire sign energy.

Bjorn has Mars in Pisces conjunct Anni-Frid’s moon and is generally more approachable and non-threatening than Benny.

The spring of 1982

In the spring of 1982, when the group last worked together, Mars, Pluto and Saturn were conjunct in transit through Libra. Libra is the sign of both Benny and Bjorn’s moon/Neptune conjunction.

Uranus and Neptune were transiting Sagittarius, Benny’s sun and Mars sign.

Benny had the worst transits of the all the members. Mars/Saturn/Pluto is an angry, volatile transit. In Libra it says, partnerships will blow up. And Uranus and Neptune to the mix, and Benny was under fire from all the outer planets.

Because Benny has Mars conjunct sun in Sagittarius, it’s possible he lost control and became extremely angry. Libra moon hates anger but he may have been holding back intense anger and hurt from past situations. Sagittarius (with Mars attached) isn’t fond of self-control.

Bjorn didn’t fare well under this transit either, the Mars/Saturn/Pluto conjunction says, “Don’t pretend things in your relationship don’t bother you.”

While the women may be more intense, in 1982 the men appear to have undergone deep psychological changes regarding their desire to have partnership at any cost (Libra).

Superstardom has fractured many a person and Benny and Bjorn were hit very hard by the outer planets in 1982. I’m glad they are still smiling.

Astrological conclusion

It appears the pairing of opposites in two couples created the friction necessary to create music that connected to people over the entire globe.

Those opposites also created tension that was violently shook as the men faced deep psychological changes indicated by the Mars/Saturn/Pluto transit of Libra. Libra prefers “partnership-lite” and the intense girls may have been making some challenges.

The transits suggest that something “happened” in 1982 and there wasn’t simply a drifting apart. Even though their marriages broke apart, these four people clearly feel respect for each other to have kept their Mars/Saturn/Pluto encounters out of the news.

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Does the Easter Bunny Promote Promiscuity?

Posted on March 24, 2012 by ohioastrology

Some holiday and mythical figures such as Santa Claus and the Toothy Fairy have vague mythical and/or psychological origins.

The Easter Bunny, on the other hand, is an astronomical and astrological delight.

Easter is clearly connected to the seasons, to the cycles of our planet earth. Easter is the first Sunday after the first full moon after the vernal equinox (start of Spring).

Easter is about spring in its moon-fullness.

What else happens at this time?

Flowers rise from the dirt, male birds sit in trees outside your window calling for mates while puppies and kitties and bunnies are born.

Spring represents fertility.

The first sign of the zodiac, the sign that marks the beginning of spring is Aries.

Is Aries about fertility?

Aries is ruled by Mars, the god of war. How does war relate to fertility?

Well, how shall we say it – in nature there are no fancy restaurants with fine wine.

Male cats don’t ask female cats for their phone numbers, spend time getting to know her habits (I wake at 6 a.m., bug my owner for food, then use the litter box at 7 a.m.), while waiting for the right moment to put his paw on her paw.

It goes a little more Arian than that in nature.

Aries is the energy that makes us get up, do something, take action and penetrate life. Aries is male energy because it is outward directed.

Aries is the flower that breaks through the dirt to reach the sun. Aries is the chick that breaks through the egg. Aries breaks things to become itself.

No wonder the Aries in your life always seem to be causing trouble . . .

Aries is the sexual drive, if not the fertility. The fertility, to me, appears in the next cardinal sign, Cancer.

The Easter Bunny

This brings us to the Easter Bunny who, if you recall from your trip to the grocery store Easter section, also lays eggs.

Both bunnies and eggs represent fertility. The bunny is the Aries yang sexual energy and the egg is the Cancer yin fertility energy.

Aries is active, Cancer is receptive.

This is so nice, so natural.

But how does it affect our children?

Does eating chocolate Easter bunnies and eggs promote promiscuity?

There is some talk out there on the Internet that the pleasure one gets in eating chocolate is similar to the pleasure one has during orgasm. While that appears to be untrue, chocolate does seem to provide an intense sensual pleasure that is more than one has when eating, say, green beans.

So, let’s think about this.

We’re providing sexual (bunny) and fertility (egg) images in elation-producing chocolate to our children at the beginning of spring.

Wow.

I see so much concerned parenting and worry over negative influence that I wonder how Easter slipped past. While I wouldn’t call Easter a negative influence (in fact, I like it more than ever now), it does seem to promote some non-studious behavior.

I hate to worry parents in America, but it may be time to re-evaluate what one puts in the Easter basket for one’s children.

Possibly keeping bunnies and eggs is okay, but removing the chocolate. How about Easter Bunny bread? Or Easter Egg meatloaf?

Off to buy some chocolate

Writing about chocolate has produced a craving for a candy bar in this OHA writer. I think I’ll stick to my usual square bars of chocolate. This writer needs no fertility at the moment.

Square, I know. But I am an earth sign.

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What Sign of the Zodiac is Ice Cream?

Posted on March 22, 2012 by ohioastrology

Many years ago my friend somehow convinced me to babysit her young son while she went to a concert. Her son was probably eight or nine at the time.

In an effort to keep him occupied, I took him for ice cream. Before even ordering the ice cream, while standing in line, his excitement was so great he jumped up and down, hand attached to my hand, the rest of his body in involuntary motion.

Later, with ice cream in hand, he continued the jittery behavior and did what many children do – he dropped the top portion of the ice cream from the cone.

What struck me at the time was how ice cream could make a kid so crazy, even before eating it. Did ice cream emit a secret, addictive scent, I wondered? I’ve wondered then and since if there isn’t a chemical in ice cream that functions as a highly addictive stimulant and that can be emitted and absorbed without actually having eaten the ice cream.

Here in Columbus, Ohio’s capital, Jeni’s Splendid Ice Creams has gone beyond popular. Jeni’s is probably the sole reason friends who have left Columbus return for a visit. They barely step out of the plane or car when they ask, “Can we go to Jeni’s?”

Milk and Sugar

Ice cream is comprised of mostly milk and sugar.

Milk is what we first eat as children. Milk comes from the breast of a female beast. Milk, then, is mothering and is the sign of Cancer.

Milk contains lactose, a sugar. Sugar provides pleasure. The planet of pleasure is Venus. Venus rules both Taurus and Libra.

So is ice cream a Cancer, Taurus or Libra?

The milk we use here in the states comes mostly from cows, which suggests Taurus. However, the compulsive comfort we seek from ice cream feels a lot like the sign of Cancer, an emotionally dependent sign.

As someone who’s never been extremely fond of ice cream, I find that when others eat ice cream, they are very demanding that I eat ice cream too. I’ve noticed this my whole life.

I don’t find this same thing happens when my friends eat hamburgers or candy bars. When my friends eat hamburgers or candy bars, they don’t seem to care if I’m eating a salad or a piece of cake. Rejection of ice cream, on the other hand, causes great stress to the friendship.

In addition to its compulsive power, ice cream creates a strong desire to share the experience.

I’m going to go with CANCER.

Cancer is a cardinal water sign, the sign of family, mothering, nurturing and belonging. Feeding milk to an infant through one’s body is the ultimate nurturing behavior.

Mothering gone wild are the individuals (both men and women) who are overprotective to the point of being suffocating.

Cancer is ruled by the moon and reacts emotionally to all external stimuli and craves emotional security and comfort. The child clinging to the leg of a parent is experiencing Cancer-like desire for emotional comfort. As the child grows he removes his hand from mom’s leg, but the feeling doesn’t go away.

Ice cream, then, is the ultimate comfort food.

Oh, and there’s the land of milk and honey, which is essentially the land of ice cream.

Posted in The most . . . sign of the zodiac | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments

Ohio Astrology Endorses Santorum for Ambassador to Philippines

Posted on March 22, 2012 by ohioastrology

The Illinois primary win by Mitt Romney and Jeb Bush’s (American Royalty) endorsement of Romney suggest that soon the other candidates will move out of the way.

Rick Santorum, the longest-lasting “not Romney” candidate, will probably be most disappointed. After Santorum’s severe attack on Romney, I don’t know if Romney would select Santorum for a position in a potential Romney administration.

Ohio Astrology, as usual, helps where it can and has looked at potential ambassador positions that might suit Santorum well should Romney open his heart to a Primary foe. Romney’s moon in Scorpio says he’s won’t forget a past hurt. But Romney should note that the good thing about ambassadorships is that is puts your enemies both in reach and far away.

Maybe ambassadorships were invented for that reason alone.

Maybe planet earth would contain one, big country with one language if it weren’t for the human desire to send those we dislike to far off places.

Philippines

Like a political ambassador dating service, Ohio Astrology spent untold hours (unpaid) finding a suitable match for Santorum. The country criteria for Santorum suitability was:

  1. Pornography is illegal
  2. Abortion is illegal
  3. Guns are legal
  4. Sun or moon matching Santorum’s sun (Taurus) or moon (Aquarius)

I found countries that matched the first three criteria such as Saudi Arabia, Libya and Egypt, but none had the sun or moon in Taurus or Aquarius.

Almost losing hope of finding a match on the planet earth for Santorum, OHA finally landed in the Philippines.

Based on the February 2, 1987 constitution, the Philippines has sun in Aquarius, moon in Pisces or Aries. The Philippines’ sun is conjunct (maybe) Santorum’s moon suggesting that Santorum will feel a sense of comfort in this land.

Moon in Aquarius feels comfort from engaging in unusual or rebellious behavior. The Philippines and Santorum might both be “guerilla conservatives.” Don’t forget that the Philippines fought hard against US occupation, the same way that Santorum is fighting against “Romney occupation.”

Both Santorum and the Philippines have Saturn in Sagittarius, suggesting a certain lack of optimism, a lack of wonder about the world. Sagittarius seeks the sublime and Saturn in Sagittarius says it’s difficult to feel a sense of awe about being alive.

The Philippines also has Uranus and Venus in Sagittarius suggesting that the Philippines does have its moments experiencing the sublime with foreigners or foreign experiences. Philippines vacillates between wild enthusiasm and social conservatism. It’s kind of “I believe, I don’t believe” type of behavior. There’s definitely some guilt (Saturn) after a wild night of Uranus/Venus in Sagittarius risk-taking behavior.

Although Santorum and the Philippines share Aquarian energy, the Philippines lacks earth in the chart. The only earth is Neptune in Capricorn, Neptune a watery, foggy god.

It makes sense as the Philippines is a spotty archipelago surrounded by water. Santorum may have difficulty with wet, soggy surroundings.

The Philippines has Pluto in Scorpio conjunct Santorum’s Neptune in Scorpio. In this land, Santorum might find himself obsessed with someone or under someone’s charismatic control.

The Philippines’ Mars in Aries is conjunct Santorum’s Mercury in Aries so Santorum would feel in the Philippines that he could speak his mind openly.

Pick Rick

There may be a more suitable country for an Ambassador Santorum, but until OHA receives a grant or other funding, there is just not enough time to do the necessary research.

If Romney is the GOP Candidate (very likely) and he wins the general election (highly unlikely according to some Sunday morning news show pundits) and he gets to choose ambassadors (highly unlikely squared), OHA suggests that Romney “Pick Rick” for a spot far overseas.

If Santorum can’t get his country to agree with his values, he can always spend time in a country that already shares his values.

Posted in Politicians - Republican Presidential Candidates | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

The Luckiest Sign of the Zodiac is . . .

Posted on March 21, 2012 by ohioastrology

Jupiter is the planet associated with luck and abundance. When Jupiter is transiting, it is seen as a lucky time.

Modern astrologers recognize that “luck” is in the eye of the beholder, as are many qualities. Jupiter represents abundance, which has a positive connotation. An abundance of money is a nice thing but an abundance of carpenter ants in the basement is not.

If you have Mars in Pisces in the 4th house, for example, and Jupiter transits Pisces, you might receive a “lucky” offer to live by the ocean or you might find, unluckily, that your basement isn’t sealed properly and your basement is an ocean every time it rains.

Jupiter “expands what it finds” I learned from an astrologer at the 1992 American Federation of Astrologers convention. That valueless statement is the best one, I believe, when dealing with Jupiter transits.

Jupiter can expand waistlines, too, by the way.

Sagittarius

Jupiter is the planet that rules the mutable fire sign Sagittarius. Sagittarius, you may remember, was also branded by OHA as Clumsiest Sign of the Zodiac.

Are luck and clumsiness related?

I think they are.

Look at it this way. Earth signs (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn) are known to be routine. If you know someone who gets up at the same time each day, eats at the same time each day and pretty much has the same routine all the time, you’re probably looking at an earth sign.

If every day you do the same thing, most likely every day you will have similar experiences. You certainly may run into some new people or situations, but after a few days of routine, the staff at Starbucks will soon know your order upon hearing your voice, the waitress at the diner will give you “the regular” and your pet will know to wake you at 6 a.m.

When following routine, magic rarely happens.

I think what’s called “luck” occurs more to the Sagittarius simply because Sagittarius (and its polar opposite Gemini) is unpredictable. Sagittarius follows the scent of the sublime and that scent may lead it to a stick of incense or a perfume shop or to a million other places.

When you are open to unique and different experiences, “luck” may occur.

When you’re open to new experiences and your head is in the clouds, you may also trip on uneven pavement invoking the title of clumsy.

Two Shades of Luck

Luck comes in two varieties – good and bad. Both are ready to strike a blow at the individual who opens to experience and looks at each day as a unique moment of time and space.

Being open, I’m learning, means holding back on the value judgment and experiencing the experience. Often when perceived “bad” experiences occur, we shut down the path to any experience that may resemble the bad experience. If “good” experiences occur, we seek more of the same type of experience.

Sagittarius has good “luck” because it accepts both the good and bad that comes its way without judgment. Sagittarius may be headstrong and opinionated, but it is not judgmental. Sagittarius, then, has both “good” and “bad” luck.

“Luck,” then, may simply represent unique experiences rather than unique experiences leading to “luck.”

If you’re not a Sagittarius, you can have “good luck” too. You simply have to be open to all luck, both “good” and “bad.”

Posted in The most . . . sign of the zodiac | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

Get Your Saturn Off My Sun! (Romney in Illinois)

Posted on March 19, 2012 by ohioastrology

You have a horoscope. Others have a horoscope. Planets in their horoscopes can be compared to planets in your horoscope. The planets in their horoscopes, if they were placed on top of your horoscope like a stencil on top of paper, would create aspects in your horoscope.

In life it feels like this: You meet someone and instantly feel attracted. Conversation flows, you say your witty things, the other laughs. The other says interesting things, you ask questions. You never stop to think “What should I say next?” There is no awkward silence.

You and this person have some nice aspects. Maybe it’s a love attraction and his Mars is on your Venus. Or maybe it’s an intellectual attraction and her Uranus is sparking your Mercury. Or maybe it’s just affable friendliness and your moon is conjunct her sun in a sunny, extroverted sign.

You’ve also sat next to someone at dinner or an event where you asked a question and received a conversation ending answer like “yes” or “no.” You try again and get another short response. Every question is a tortuous attempt to create a natural flow that never happens.

Maybe that person’s Mars is squaring your Mars meaning you just don’t flow the same direction. Or maybe that person’s Venus is opposite your Venus and you relate differently. Or maybe that person’s Saturn is conjunct your Mercury and he just doesn’t want to talk.

Or maybe it’s the dreaded Saturn conjunct your sun.

Saturn

Saturn is about responsibility, control and discipline. That’s nice stuff to have if you are responsible for something, in control of a nuclear reactor or planning to run a marathon.

At a dinner party, Saturn isn’t as much fun.

The sun is our conscious self, the self we try to project.

Their Saturn on your sun means there is a parental, controlling feel when in the presence of that person. If you like that sort of thing, it can create a partnership of shared responsibility. If you don’t like that sort of thing, it feels like that person is a drag, a wet blanket. Often the person is older and feels like a parent figure.

For the Saturn person, the sun person feels irresponsible or out of control in some way. The sun’s behavior embarrasses the Saturn person.

Mitt Romney in Illinois

Speaking of Saturn on one’s sun, Illinois, the state of next week’s primary, has Saturn and Pluto in Pisces. Neither is in the exact degree, but they are in the sign of Mitt Romney’s sun.

This kind of aspect doesn’t tell me whether Romney will win Illinois or not, but it definitely says that Illinois will be very heavy on Romney’s shoulder.

The feeling I get is of a school kid walking home trying to avoid bullies. Illinois is the street Romney must walk to pass the bullies, the street between “school” and “home.” Saturn and Pluto ganging up on a person is a mafia-like energy.

Next Tuesday’s primary is like running the gauntlet for Romney.

Illinois is a Sagittarian state with Mars, sun, Uranus, Mercury and Neptune all in fiery Sagittarius. Sagittarius squares Pisces.

Back to the dinner party, Romney sitting next to Illinois. Illinois says, “How about them Bulls?” And Romney says, “The Bulls, basketball, yeah, I love basketball.”

Illinois, the Sagittarian gambler, then says, “How much you betting on the Bulls?”

Romney, the spiritual Pisces says, “Aw, I don’t really bet on sports. I only make bets with anxiety-ridden political opponents during debates. Sports are fun to watch, but it doesn’t really matter who wins.”

Illinois wants some hard-talking, spirited, opinionated Sagittarian banter and won’t like Romney’s Piscean “let me get along with everyone” talk.

To Romney, Illinois will feel like an irresponsible, freewheeling gangsta state.

Romney just needs to remember that we’ve all run past bullies at some time in our lives.

Run, Romney, run!

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Ohio Political Fight Club: Beatty and Long

Posted on March 18, 2012 by ohioastrology

Ohio’s re-configured 3rd Congressional District will have a new representative this fall. Joyce Beatty, Democrat and Chris Long, Republican, will be duking it out for a seat in the House of Representatives.

Trying to find Long’s birthday, I stumbled upon his website. If that’s all one can muster, I thought, I’d definitely vote for his opponent. A man with a 1990s website may have difficulty with 21st century issues. Long’s website reminds me of the old diners you find in some small towns (like Mount Vernon) that have a sign in the window announcing the restaurant has air conditioning.

Beatty’s website, powered by Blue Campaign Solutions, appears much more polished at first. So I began to dig through her site to find – nothing. I either donate or volunteer. I’m guessing with Blue Campaign Solutions behind her, the site will improve.

Here’s where Democrat and Republican can meet for some bi-partisan website development.

Long can steal Beatty’s look and feel while Beatty add information about what she plans to do for the people who may elect her.

Both need to remember that this is OHIO. This is the state where Rick Santorum and Mitt Romney dueled like 18th century dandies for the hand of OHIO. In the fall, politicians will be traversing our state like chipmunks running across back patios hiding nuts.

Develop a good, navigable, relevant website, Beatty and Long, and make OHIO proud.

Joyce Beatty

I found Beatty’s date of birth, but not Long’s. Beatty is a Pisces sun and Capricorn moon.

You heard it, Pisces and Capricorn. I talk about those signs a lot because Neptune has just entered Pisces for its 13-year travel through that sign. Pluto is in Capricorn and will be there for about ten more years.

Beatty’s Saturn is in Virgo and Mars/Neptune in Libra.

You heard it, Virgo and Libra. I talk about these two signs a lot because Saturn is still transiting Libra and Mars is retrograde in Virgo until mid-summer.

This is an interesting time for Beatty.

Sensitive and Hard

Sun in Pisces and moon in Capricorn is an interesting combination. Pisces is the mutable water sign, the last sign of the zodiac, the one that is most sensitive and feeling. Pisces feels so much and so strongly that it often must retreat for protection.

Retreat for Pisces can involve imaginative play, creativity, daydreaming or pure escapism through drugs and alcohol.

Pisces is the most empathetic of the signs – the only sign, I sometimes think, that truly feels others’ pain. Pisces is associated with mediumistic tendencies.

Because of this sensitivity, Pisces is prone to easy manipulation through outside influences. More than any other sign, Pisces takes on the quality of the environment.

Moon in Capricorn, on the other hand, is NOT like Pisces. Rather than feeling, it is about control. This can be good for a boundary-less Piscean soul but also can be difficult because the feelings have difficulty being expressed.

How does this play out in the personality?

Beatty might be a sympathetic soul who listens and understands yet still demands that you do the work to change your life. She will have sympathy for you as long as you DESERVE sympathy.

Go ahead, cry on her shoulder, then get back to work. Try to cry every day on that shoulder and that shoulder will turn very, very cold.

Beatty might be drawn to politics out of a Piscean desire to help humanity. We’re seeing a lot of Pisces energy this election season, with Piscean sun Mitt Romney running for the presidency.

It’s raining Pisces.

Saturn in Virgo

Beatty’s Saturn in Virgo means she’s a perfectionist who never truly feels she’s good or perfect enough. Capricorn moon usually supports this kind of thinking and often punishes itself for every little deed considered bad (which is just about everything).

Beatty tries hard to be good and is more upset with herself that you’ll ever be when she feels she’s failed.

No need to punish Beatty, ever. She can punish herself much better than you can.

Mars and Neptune in Libra

Mars and Neptune in Libra bring charm and a warm, approachable demeanor. This conjunction trines Beatty’s Venus in Aquarius which makes friends with everyone, engages with everyone and is everyone’s best friend.

Beatty is best friend to many and close friend to few.

Moon in Capricorn is the boundary that the rest of her chart lacks. While in some ways this is good, I bet it troubles Beatty that at a certain point, her friendships start to fizzle. She makes friends fast and quick, but at some point the friendships may grow cold and distant.

Current Transits

Pluto in Capricorn will be conjunct that moon in Capricorn. Beatty can expect some female friendships to grow cold, very cold. Beatty, sun in Pisces, may wonder why. There’s a moat between Beatty and her friends that her friends may be explaining to her.

Uranus in Aries will square that moon causing additional, sudden disruptions in female friendships. Also, Beatty’s suppressed resentments will rise like volcano ash.

Beatty’s north node is in Aries so she is meant to assert herself. She may be learning some lessons about being tough versus being mean.

Saturn has passed its conjunction of Mars and Neptune, which must have also been rough. The charm wasn’t working for a while. By fall, the faucet of charm should be fixed as Saturn moves into Scorpio.

Neptune in Pisces will be conjunct Beatty’s Mercury in Pisces. This is story telling at its finest. You can say the water is poisoned or you can say it contains a necessary mineral.

I’m seeing a lot of Pisces in this election and I’m wondering if these Pisces are supposed to tell us about some pollution or water-borne issue (as Pisces is collective water). Hopefully one of these Pisces will spit out the truth if something like this is occurring.

Mars in Virgo until mid-summer will be triggering Beatty’s insecure Saturn in Virgo. She will be incomplete and insecure until sometime in June. As Mars passes from Virgo to Libra, she will feel energized, both charming and charmed and popular.

Late summer will be a pleasant and fun time for Beatty. Going into the fall election, she will feel like a million bucks.

Improve the website

Hopefully Beatty will improve her website to include her Piscean sun and Aquarian Venus vision for her electorate.

I suggest that Beatty add lots of pictures of herself. Pisces sun with Mars/Neptune conjunct in Libra make for a physically beautiful person. Attractiveness is a quality few of us can resist.

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Republican Fight Club: True Grit Versus Cheesy Grits

Posted on March 16, 2012 by ohioastrology

Ya’ll may have missed the Alabama and Mississippi primary results this week. Rick Santorum took both states although Mitt Romney is still way ahead in delegates.

I can’t help it – I like it when Rick Santorum wins.

Don’t tell my friends.

Articles are using the word I planned to use to describe Santorum – grit. Santorum has that fixed-sign perseverance called grit. Romney seems to want to buy the election so every time Santorum steals some ground, I feel excited.

It’s an underdog story that usually does well on the other side of the fence (Democrat) in politics.

Grit versus Grits

The word “grit” is not to be confused with “grits” which is (courtesy of dictionary.com) “coarsely ground hominy, boiled and sometimes then fried, eaten as a breakfast dish or as a side dish with meats.”

Ya’ll may have missed the news that Romney, in an effort to relate to the folks down yonder, mentioned at a rally how he’d eaten “cheesy grits” for breakfast.

Maybe Romney had humble pie for supper.

Cheesy Grit

Why did Romney’s comment about cheesy grits come across as cheesy and Santorum’s win down south come across as personal grit?

It keeps going back to the same thing for me – Santorum is being himself and Romney is not.

This is an astrology blog so you knew this was coming – What is different about their charts that Santorum is comfortable being himself and Romney is not?

Earth and Water

Santorum is a fixed earth sign (Taurus) and Romney is a mutable water sign (Pisces). I can’t confirm either man’s time of birth although I’ve seen a chart for Romney which gives him a (believable) Gemini rising.

Earth

Earth signs are practical and take care of the everyday matters of life that some of the other elements find difficult such as:

  • Paying bills
  • Paying bills on time
  • Cleaning the dirty mess in the corner
  • Organizing the shoe closet
  • Making a plan and sticking with it
  • Eating the same meal at the same time for a long, long time
  • Having the same views for a long, long time

Being earth myself, I understand how Santorum thinks. He looks at politics in practical terms as when he says things like, “It’s a great idea, but you’ll never get it through Congress.”

Practical.

Santorum describes how he voted yes on bills that included things he didn’t like because if you’re a Republican and other Republicans support it, you say yes.

Practical.

For Taurus, this is all very easy, really. The world is Boolean for a Taurus so making decisions is easy – there are two choices, right and wrong. Just choose the right one.

To a Gemini or Libra, this makes no sense.

It’s practical.

Water

Water signs are emotional and notice the undercurrents in the room that other elements, such as earth and air, do not notice.

Here are some things that water signs notice that you completely missed:

  • When you said you liked the casserole, your left eye twitched a little indicating that you were lying
  • At the loud bustling party where you can’t hear yourself think, there is a person standing in the corner feeling sad
  • Your mother wants you to call
  • Your girlfriend doesn’t really love you
  • Everyone at work would like you better if you wore some deodorant
  • No one really liked the punch

Water notices and FEELS everything. For Pisces (and Scorpio moon) Romney, standing in front of a crowd trying to act like one of the fellas must be extremely, and I mean EXTREMELY, difficult for such a sensitive fella.

Imagine if you could feel the emotions of each person in a crowded room. For a sensitive Pisces, it’s a circuit-breaking experience.

In a colossal Piscean effort to relate, Romney seems to try to change his persona for the people in the room. The irony is that he probably relates more than any other candidate but appears to relate less than any other candidate.

Romney comes across as cheesy because he’s trying to be a Political Candidate rather than himself which could simply be Sensitive Political Candidate.

American men, in general, don’t wear sensitivity well.

True grit or cheesy grits?

While the math suggests Santorum can’t win the Republican nomination, he is a practical man who has some strategy. If he’s continuing in the race, there must be some way he’s worked out that he can win (such as being nominated at the convention).

I’ll sit back and enjoy the movie, I mean electoral process, and see if True Grit can overcome Cheesy Grits.

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